Broken Shards of Memories
by JacksonFrost
Summary: Fragments in the relationship of Dean and Lavender.


**Author's Note:** This is for the "Fragments" challenge, on the HPFC forums. My fragments were "Falling in love," "Time apart," and "Falling out of love," with the obscure pairing Dean/Lavender. It was a lot of fun to write, please review! :)

* * *

**Broken Shards of Memories**

_Falling In Love_

It is sixth year, and Ron has just broken up with Lavender. It hurts, so bad, and she tries to hide it, tries to listen to Parvati when she tells her how immature Ron is and how he is not worth her time, but it still hurts, and she finds herself crying more often than not. It's her first break-up, and she thought she was in love, and she can't stand the sight of the red next to the bushy brown, it makes her feel physically ill.

Seamus and Dean have taken to spending more and more time with her and Parvati, and it makes the tears dwindle and the pain ease, as who can cry when they're bent over laughing from something Seamus said?

"I think he likes you, you know," Parvati mentions casually after one such afternoon.

Lavender frowns. "Seamus? Oh. No. We're just friends."

Parvati looks at her, eyebrows raised. "And that's all you want to be? You twirl your hair a lot when you're around him, and I know you do that with the guys you like. Merlin knows your hair almost fell off with Ron," she says, rolling her eyes. "Lav, I'm your best friend. I know the signs."

Lavender giggles despite herself. "Parvati, I'm not twirling my hair for Seamus, promise. Really, I'm surprised you'd think that he likes me. I thought he liked _you._"

"Really?" Parvati asks, grinning with relief. "I hope he does, I think he's so cute, and yesterday, he- Wait. Who are you twirling your hair for? Oh Godric, is it _Dean_?"

Lavender flushes, thinking of his warm brown eyes and his easy grin. "Shut up," she hisses. "Maybe. I dunno, I just- yeah, he's cute."

Parvati looks at her knowingly. "Well," she whispers, "I've seen him staring. I think he may like you too."

--

It starts with a brush of their hands and a tingle of electricity. Then an exchange of a hesitant smile and a blush. It leads to a stammered invitation to the next Hogsmeade weekend, and an enthusiastic _yes_. And then they're kissing, timid mixing in with bold, nerves turning to passion, over and over and over again.

--

"Lavender?"

"Yes?"

"Are you truly over Ron? I mean, not that I would care, I just…want to know."

"Dean, I promise you that Ron doesn't mean two figs to me. I found someone who is a million times better than he is."

"Mm, that's very good news."

"Yes. Yes, it is. Dean?"

"Yes?"

"I think I'm in love with you."

"Lavender, I _know_ I'm in love with you."

--

And then it's gut-wrenching, heart-stopping, _oh Merlin,_ all-consuming, fiery love.

* * *

_Time Apart_

Lavender never had much use for Ginny Weasley before her seventh year, but now, she finds herself looking to Ginny for the courage she herself lacks. It would have been embarrassing, Ginny's a year below her, and there is the fact that she had been with Dean before Lavender, but circumstances have changed entirely. Dean is missing, driven into hiding with his questionable blood status, and under all probability, has been captured by Snatchers. Lavender is stuck at Hogwarts, living in terror under the Carrows' rule.

She doesn't think she can handle it, but there's Ginny, the girlfriend of the most hunted boy in Britain. And Ginny's fiery bravery makes her think that maybe, she can be brave too.

So she stands up for the first years who are tortured before her very eyes by the despicable Carrows. And she spends hours in the library with Seamus, looking up something, _anything_ that will help them find Dean- and if she knows it's useless, well, it makes them both feel like they're doing _something._ She joins Dumbledore's Army again, and proudly scrawls their slogan on the walls under the cover of darkness, her own form of rebellion. She tries to be brave, and to not cry. (_Dean never liked it when she cried._)

But it's hard. It's seven months of letters unsent, wishes not granted, prayers unanswered. It's seven months of pain and longing and fear and doubt.

But she loves him, she loves him _so much_, and she refuses to give up on him, because she knows he will be back, and she knows he will be okay.

--

Dean sits on the cold ground every night, listening to the harsh mutters of his captors, and prays for salvation. He thinks of Seamus, and it's like a hard punch in the stomach, because _Merlin_ he misses him. He thinks of his mum, and he thinks that if it wasn't for his aversion to crying, he would be sobbing and would never be able to stop, because he misses her, and he feels like he's seven again and all he wants is his mum.

And he thinks of Lavender, and it hurts, it hurts like hell, but it also gives him strength. He wakes up every day, for her. He clenches his teeth when the Snatchers curse him, and doesn't fight back, for her. He will return, he _will_, for her.

--

It's seven months of hell, but the thought of each other makes it bearable.

* * *

_Falling Out of Love_

Screams define their relationship now.

He can still hear the screams of pure agony that were ripped from Lavender's throat as Greyback attacked her.

She listens as he talks, harshly and bitterly, about his torture at the hand of the Snatchers, and the Malfoys, and she fills the gaps in her mind with the sound of his screams.

He hears her scream in the night, clawing at her hospital sheets as if she's fighting off a werewolf again.

She lies awake in her hospital bed at night, when he's visiting, sometimes, and waits for the screams that start when he falls into a restless sleep filled with terrifying memories.

--

They're two broken souls, and Lavender tries to convince herself that together, they're whole.

But she can't overlook the fact that he won't tell her what he's feeling, that he prefers to go out and get drunk with Seamus instead of staying with her.

She can't ignore the fact that sometimes, he flinches when he looks at her and sees the scars that line her arms and her chest and that cover her face.

Dean tries to avoid the guilty feeling that squirms uncomfortably in his stomach whenever he looks into her mangled face, but he can't.

He tries to tell her about what happened those seven months, but it's _not_ okay, and it's _not _going to be okay, no matter _what_ she says, and he hates that about her.

Sometimes, he thinks they're both too broken to ever work.

--

It starts with an accusation. Then it's an exchange of harsh words. It leads to tears and more fighting and screaming and anger. And then they're breaking up, in a blur of regret and relief and guilt.

--

"I'm sorry, Lavender."

"Me too, Dean."

"I wish I could have handled this better, but I'm still so fucked up, and I just can't-"

"We could have made it work. But seven months-"

"It was too long. Our relationship was still so new, it couldn't have survived."

"Yeah. I wish…"

"I know, Lav. Me too."

--

And their love is torn apart by screams and wars and scars and time. This breakup is more mature than it was with Ron, or with Ginny, but at the same time, it's harder, _so much_ harder, because what they had was true love, and now it's gone, yet another casualty of the War.

And all they have left are the broken shards of their memories.


End file.
